[lead] T minus 5 days. [/lead]
And counting. I’m hoping that this happens this weekend and that I can start Monday fresh without negative energy, self-doubt and anger filling up the air that is mostly unbreathable at home.
It’s crazy that this all started with a spoon in the sugar bowl and escalated into what it is today – a lost friendship, hurt feelings and a lot of broken appliances. I’d like to say that I didn’t have any part in the breakdown of our relationship, but I’d be lying if I did. In reality, I was done after the second threat to move out. The trust was lost when he went to the landlord to give his notice before he could muster up the courage to tell me that he was upset about the goddamned spoon in the sugar bowl.
I had the power to turn things around. But I chose not to use it. I want him to leave. I don’t want his judgements, nasty looks or determination to sleep with everyone I’ve ever met anymore. I want some peace and quiet without the biting comments about the ways the towels are folded, the delusions about the inequality in the division of housekeeping tasks. Or the inflated air of importance that actually is just hiding fear.
Part of me feels sorry for him; his inability to communicate face to face or be present for confrontation. His low self-esteem and his self-centeredness.
That’s it. I think I’m done writing about that. I’m ready to close that chapter and start a new one.